I think people are hoping for a “meet cute” story, something Woody Allen or Nora Ephron would have cooked up, with a dash of the Food Network thrown in.But when I tell them the truth—and I always tell the truth about it—this mix of surprise and disappointment crosses their faces, right before they blurt out: “Really? There’s no sense of shame or failure on our part, no completely fabricated story about how we got together.To those who think meeting your mate via your Mac Book is embarrassing, unromantic, or the last resort: Welcome to the new normal. S., 40 million people have tried online dating, even Martha Stewart.
I had been married and in subsequent serious relationships, so for me these dates were the emotional equivalent of riding a ten-speed bike next to someone on training wheels.
My friend Jane, an online dating poster child and proselyte, nudged me towards
There, you could search for a partner by relationship status—divorced, single, widowed. Check out ) You could even search by city, hair color, and—especially intriguing for me because I’m 5’10” and have a fondness for heels—height.
But first I had to create an online profile, which took more time, thought, and energy than I expected. The deeper I got into the process, the more I realized I had never given serious consideration to what I wanted or needed in a partner. How about career, education level, children, drug use, hair, age, religion?
What were my non-negotiables and what truly mattered in a mate?
For me, relationships always began with mutual attraction.
What if you started with shared values and interests and then explored the chemistry aspect?
The six months I spent online were fascinating, fun, and frustrating.
One of the top New Year's resolutions is always to find love.