Want to meet attractive woman for occasional afternoon fun.” There were a surprisingly high number of headshots.
A lot of the men were overweight, scruffy and unattractive, but some were handsome. Within 48 hours, I’d arranged to meet three different married men for afternoon coffee.
They all suggested areas near to where they worked in different parts of central London, but none asked which area would be convenient for me.
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Donning a fake wedding ring to appear married and wearing a summer dress and low heels, I greeted Robert, a 39-year-old events organiser at an outdoor cafe on the South Bank. “The dynamic changed between me and my wife after the children. "I’ve never cheated since the kids came along but I had an odd fling or two with an ex before we married.” So what prompted him to even look for a site like this?
Well-spoken, charming and trim, he revealed he was married with two children under eight. “I’d been thinking of joining for a while but I wouldn’t do anything that might jeopardise us or to make her suspect. Last week I shipped her and the kids off to South Africa so this is my window of opportunity.” I couldn’t resist asking him how he would feel if his wife did the same. “I know that’s hypocritical and I know that sounds a b****** thing to say but it’s a male pride thing.” When I meet my next ‘date’, Brian, a 46-year-old who works in construction, I pretend to be feeling guilty about our clandestine tryst outside a restaurant off Oxford Street, thinking he might confess to feeling the same. “I’ve had three affairs before so I don’t feel bad any more,” he shrugged. I deserve to have some fun.” Brian has been married for 14 years and has two school-age children. Every time we sit down there’s a pathetic dispute about something,” he complains.
“I’ve been married for four years but we’ve been together for 12. “The first time, it made me realise there is more out there, life doesn’t have to be miserable. We could be having the best holiday but she always finds something to worry about. She says the children are a chore but they’re not, they’re a joy. He heard about the site through a friend who he says used it to cheat on his wife a staggering 40 times. What struck me from both meetings and the many emails is that not one expressed any pangs of guilt.
“He used normal dating websites too and didn’t say he was married.” I asked him if he would have looked for an affair if he had a good sex life with his wife. Considering they were looking for easy, no-strings-attached sex I found it hard to believe how demanding they were. One man who wanted to meet requested I wore open-toed sandals because he ‘had a thing for nice feet’.
My third ‘date’, James, gave me his mobile number but instructed me sternly not to text unless he texted first.
James, 52, was an entrepreneur, starting his own social media business.
He was on his second marriage of ten years with no children.
He arrived in shorts and a faded casual t-shirt, with a whiff of over-applied aftershave.
In the last week Twilight’s Kristen Stewart, co-star Robert Pattinson’s girlfriend, has confessed to an affair with her married director Rupert Sanders, 41, and ‘heartbroken and devastated’ Anthea Turner is reported to have thrown out husband Grant Bovey over an alleged affair with an interior designer. I wrote: “Been married since university and beginning to feel I’ve missed out on life – looking for someone to add originality.” I didn’t say whether I had any children. And I added an old photo which showed off my body shape in a revealing cocktail dress but my head was turned so my face was unrecognisable.